With Valentine's day coming up.. I thought this would be a great subject to talk about, dating.
Dating is like being interviewed. You are courting a person with social activities with the aim of assessing if the other is suitable for partnership. As kids in high school, dating is about having fun, and think its "cool" to have a boyfriend, or girlfriend. As we grow older, we come to find ourselves looking for more than that, a companionship, a lifetime best friend. Someone that can match most, if not all, our ideal wants and needs in a person. We also must realize that we can't obtain that "perfect" person, because we all have our faults. So expect don't expect so much of them but also don't give up on that ideal person because its what makes us narrow down to that potential person.
The first date is where a guy should leave a big impression, that's if he want to continue to date her. Doesn't mean expensive dinner, or burning a hole in your wallet. Just means be yourself, but don't go overboard. She is grading you, so you either pass in hopes of another date, or you fail and aren't even considered for the next date. Guys will also do the same, so if things don't work out, nothing wrong with that! Gives more options and more dates to explore and find the person just for you.
Tip: A woman loves it when the guy plans the date and doesn't tell them, if you do choose to keep it a surprise.. make it worth their while or will cost him a few points.
The one thing about having a boyfriend/girlfriend is that it limits ourselves to that one person in dating. I don't recommend steady dating til you are sure they have that potential of being the person you want/need in your life. Steady dating is one of the last steps. So don't limit yourself, being single only provides you with more opportunities and meeting new people and making friends even if things don't work out. Its about making a connection.
The first date should also be about respect. Meaning don't do something as simple as touching her/him if no "invitation" is given. It needs be about getting to know them as a person and not about sexual/physical touch. Like I said before, its an interview. If they don't give any "signal" as to allow you to do something, DON'T DO IT! It will lower your "grade". I know its hard to understand these signals, so if you try something and either he or she becomes uncomfortable, obviously stop and refrain from doing it again.
Personally I think anything physical/sexual should be put off til possibly the second or third date, depending on how BOTH feel they should progress. Give them their personal space. If you want a relationship to last, then this is a must! Have fun, don't expect anything to happen on the first date. Things take time, take it slow. I've learned rushing things ruin it, but go to slow and they might move on. Again, this is how both feel on what what pace they want to go at.
Another thing to look out for is age, yes it DOES matter. If your dating someone older, they have more experience and have been dating longer than you so they may have different expectations then you and its very hard to find a compromise. I highly recommend someone who is around the same age, I'm talking at least 1-2 years older is o.k., or 1-2 years younger. Although.. I suggest woman date older then younger since younger males can be a bit more... immature since a female's brains develop quicker compared to a male's mind. Older men, or woman may view things different as to what is o.k. to do on a date then their younger companion. So keep it within a reasonable age limit, but its also based on personal preference.
I wished dating was like it is in the movie, Pride and Prejudice, starring Keira Knightly, and Matthew Macfadyen. It was all about impressing the girl, and the small things that make the biggest difference, it makes it sweeter, and shows a lot of respect for woman. That is my ideal way to date. We all have different ideas, even if you don't agree its still a wonderful movie.
I know I contradict a lot of what I say with another thing but honestly dating is really up to you as a person and your views. I'm trying to suggest things as well as keep and open mind on different situations that could occur. Like always, this is my suggested opinions, you can choose to agree or disagree. That's the beauty of being able to form our own opinions.
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